Wednesday, May 28, 2014

Would the "Real" Real Housewives please stand up?

I looove me some reality tv! And, Bravo's Real Housewives are tops on my list. I DVR each season and watch them every time my big kids leave the room...sometimes it takes me a week to finish one episode but it's worth it. And, I must admit...those Jersey girls are my fave...hands down. I mean who doesn't love some good 'ol mob connection, sauce making, table flippin' drama??? Can't.Get.Enough! I especially love how every morning they wake up with perfect hair and lip gloss....'cuz this is my reality of course. Who am I kidding....I'm lucky if I wake up in my own bed!
Here's how a REAL episode of a real housewife would look:
Your day starts at the butt crack of dawn, you actually feel as if the day before never ended, you might be might not, chances are you have slept in the yoga pants and tshirt you wore yesterday. You go to wake one kid for school, now this one is your easy one...he hops right out of bed but immediately starts with an attitude because his fave 3 pairs of silky shorts aren't clean, the other 6 pairs he owns are not good, go wake up your 2nd kid....this one, not so easy. You beg, plead, and threaten just to get him out of bed. You dress him while he is still asleep and give him 5 min to get downstairs or else! You then stumble downstairs where your hubby is showered, dressed and starting coffee. Grrrrr..... So, you make the lunches you should have made the night before and send that good smellin' man of yours to go and get HIS children downstairs.  All the while, you are praying for the baby to sleep just long enough to get everybody out the door....he doesn't.  Breakfast time! Nobody wants what you have to offer and they whine and moan through whatever you end up fixing them. Now it's time for shoes, which they can never find, teeth brushing and fixin' hair. If you have boys, this last segment of the morning will be filled with them trying to trip, tackle or scare each other. Oh, and insert hungry baby in the middle of all the insanity. Finally, you get everybody out the door and on their way.  If you're a momma who works outside of the home.....Lord help! Oh, and it's only 7:15.....

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